Adamantium

Another year gone by. Today's the third. Come the twenty-first I'll be twenty-eight.

I'm getting fatter. My back hurts pretty constantly now. I'm still broke. I'm still unpublished. I've been lazy and tired for a while. Too long. All I want to do is quit. I wanna just lay down, settle for being a terrible plumber and run Dad's business, marry my sweetheart and start having kids like everybody else. I want to settle for what's easy. I want to be done pushing and trying. I want to do that because part of me thinks nothing better will ever happen. That part is weak and frail. It thinks the rest of me is like that.

So you know what that means I have to do right?

Of course you do. It's plain to see. That part of me that wants to quit is tiny, insignificant. Like a whiny child it sits in my way looking to pout and cry its way nowhere. I do not let the child convert me. I dig my feet down. I draw strength from the world around me. I push harder than I've pushed in a long time. I get one thing right. I get another right. I eat healthier. I work out more. I write more. I look for an agent. I look for a publisher. I work harder. I try harder. I become more responsible. I save more. I become like steel. I become like adamantium. I become unbreakable. I do what has to be done. The whiny child bends to my adamantium. He becomes the unbreakable metal along with me. I will go so far, so fast, that like the winds of a hurricane I will drag those around me along for the ride.

There's no time to settle for anything less than the best that I can do. There's no point in such a thing. Why bother existing if I will settle for "never quite tried hard enough"? If I were a sword, I should belong to the greatest swordsman, I should be as sharp as possible at all times, I should be clean and well maintained. I should not fall into disrepair nor should I remain unused.

I am a writer. I write words to tell stories, to bring about emotions, to encourage, to warn, to create. I have a talent for it. I have a talent that can make me more powerful than any weapon. I can influence the hearts and minds of anyone that can read or listen to my words. I can make someone feel like they are royalty or I can make them cower under their own fears. I can make someone love or hate me. I can be a very powerful man if I can reach the right audience.

I am very lucky to have this talent. Everyday I use it, it only grows stronger. I must not squander this ability. I can not use it to write instructions for electronics. I have to encourage love, truth, and happiness. I must be at my best. There is no room for anything less.

You have your talents. You must use them in the same way. Never give up on yourself. Find your talents and use them as best you can. Use them in a way that gives your life meaning to you. We only have a certain number of breaths to take. Use them as wisely as you can. Never stop learning. Never stop trying.

It's not easy. Don't fool yourself thinking it will be. It's hard. It might be expensive. You may need help. If you plan accordingly and make the sacrifices you need to make and never sacrifice the things that truly matter like honor and true love you will be in a better place soon enough.