Godless

Anders Behring Breivik lit up a political camp for kids in Norway with what he believed was righteous gun fire. No such thing as righteous gun fire, you know. Never will be. 77 dead. Guy did it because of his extremist right wing and Christian beliefs. Some on the right feel like his “Christianity” is being thrown around to bash all Christians. Jon Stewart had a short segment about how the right threw the “Godlessness” of the left around to bash them.

I'll tell you this: I have no God. As a child I never questioned God because it was just so certain back then. Magic was real. Good and Evil existed and there was a clear division between the two. People were destined for great things. If you worked hard people would appreciate you and help you get to the top. You could be anything you wanted no matter how much money you didn't have. I didn't know enough of anything to see the strings and seams of the universe. I couldn't explain how life showed up on this planet, so it must've been God right?

The first problem I noticed with my religion was that it said God has a plan for everyone. I'd see people livin' under bridges, kids gettin' killed, lives bein' ruined by accidents and no matter how I looked at these things I couldn't see a just God writin' out destinies for people to live this way. If God could do anything, why not give us infinite resources? Or resources that didn't destroy this world? Or do away with people that want to destroy the world? Why include evil in the design of the universe at all? Why not save us with a single wink to right all wrongs?

As I got a bit older, I found my own beliefs differin' from the beliefs laid out in many religions. I can not tolerate the ideas that females are inferior or that homosexuals are evil. I love movies, reading, and music, so I couldn't live without entertainment. I enjoy shrimp and pork. I can't love a God that asks people to do crazy things, like nearly killing Isaac, to prove their devotion to Him. I can't believe that this wonderful, creator of everything would allow a devil to ruin Job's life, even if he got everything back and then some, Job's children died and Job suffered unnecessarily. Jesus turned water into wine but I'm not supposed to drink? I figure the Catholic church seems to have an awful lot of fancy robes and buildings for a bunch of people that have surrendered all of their worldly possessions in the service of their Lord. I could go on for a while findin' what's wrong with all kinds of religions accordin' to me. It's easier for me to explain again: I have no God.

As an atheist I have an advantage over anyone followin' any doctrine: I decide for myself what is right and what is wrong. This may make life difficult sometimes because I have to consider what my best and most righteous option is. But my advantage is that consideration though, I have no book to look to for generic answers to all of life's problems. Abortion, cheating on a math test, drug addiction, music and film piracy are not moral quandaries specifically addressed in any religious text. I do my best to make the best decisions I can without the instructions of God or any person with their own ambiguous intentions. Clearly, I get it wrong sometimes. Just like anybody else I make a bad choice, I fall into temptation, but I do my best to do right. I don't hide behind any book or use it to lift myself above others. I'm no better than anyone. I just make my own choices. I weigh my options. I think for myself.

I first told my friends that I did not believe in God while we were swimming in a pool, you'd have thought I peed in it the way they all backed away from me. It was as though I had told them I had a plague. It was a little shockin' to me that these intelligent people that I'd known for years would be fearful of me for my lack of faith. It comes with the territory of any belief. Even my belief that there is no god whatsoever comes with this fear from some believers that don't understand my thinking. My thinking put simply is that a god doesn't make sense to me. I've seen some weird things and I believe there are things that we can't explain yet but I'm pretty sure that one day we will. When we do I do not believe “God” will be the answer.

I believe in bein' as kind to people as a person can be. I believe in gainin' as much knowledge as a person can. I don't believe that not believin' in a god makes me evil. If your God is opposed to me or people that believe what I do, well, me and Him weren't gonna work out anyway.